I keep my holiday decorations in one of the cedar closets upstairs. Last year I realized that I had accumulated so much that there was no more room in the closet for the Christmas tree, so I pushed the tree under a bed in one. guest rooms.
This year I decided to clean and organize this closet so that the tree would fit in, as if I didn’t have enough to do during the holidays. This had to be done, if only to prevent the door from opening occasionally in the middle of the night, causing the dog to jump into a guard position and growl. It tends to scare me.
At this point in the organizing process, I managed to pull everything out of the closet and stack it in one of the other free rooms and ignore it. My reason is that I can’t take care of anything else until I’ve tidied the tree… and I need to get some storage boxes… and I don’t want to .
When I look at everything in that closet, all the trinkets and all the dads that now clutter this room, I’m overwhelmed. I see things that I need to throw away or give away, and then I think I might need them someday.
To make matters worse, all the storage space in the basement is full. The closets of the guest rooms are full. Every closet and closet in this house contains things that I could get rid of if I didn’t hold on to the idea that I might find some use for it someday.
I like to think that I’m not the only one struggling with this.
Amid the hustle and bustle of the holidays, many memories have come to the fore. Most were good, others not so good. As each memory ushered in the next, the less good memories began to eclipse the warm vagueness. I started telling myself things like ‘don’t make that mistake anymore’ and ‘be careful about this’.
The experiences we have shape who we are, how we behave and how we interpret subsequent experiences.
Everything we see, hear or feel is hidden in a closet of memory somewhere deep in our mind. Some of them are just a mess.
Sadly, it’s a mess that we can’t throw away or give away. We can however rearrange it.
It is not an easy task to rearrange our memory cupboards. It is overwhelming and exhausting. It is more comfortable to keep all of the familiar coping strategies, even if they no longer work as well.
So, I think my resolution for the New Year will be to take more of these good memories out of storage and have them on the front of my mind where I can enjoy them.
Now what to do with all this stuff in my house.
I know, I’ll put it in the garage.
Lania Rocha is a writer for Genesee County View. Contact her at [email protected]